Tuesday, September 1, 2015

trying to resume a more regular service

Its hard. It takes time, something I don't always have enough of. How am I going to manage a more regular routine?

Over on www.braveloveblog.com she has come up with a strategy. She's calling it blogtember. Her first prompt is about introducing yourself. If I'm honest it feels kind of weird introducing myself a few years into my blogging adventure. So I got to thinking, am I a different person now to who I was when I first started blogging?

Eh, most definitely. I'm a mum.

I've done all the personality tests. I know who I was, when I worked in HR. But who am I now? Mostly I'm Ayla's mum. My life revolves around her needs, which are complex and pretty full on most of the time. It doesn't leave much time for other stuff. I'm OK with that. I love being her mum, for however long she stays with us. She has Edwards Syndrome, trisomy 18. She is my little miracle, who is redefining the classification of 'not compatible with life'.

You might think that classifying myself primarily as her mum means that I am belittling myself. Actually, I think I've grown and become much more than I was before I was her mum. I'm a carer, an educator, her nurse and a whole lot of other roles all rolled into one. I've never felt as important as she makes me feel now.

In the free time that I do have, when she is at nursery, I'm a daughter and a wife and a crafter. I love those roles too, but against being a mum they don't stand a chance! Ha! Isn't that the way it should be? I think so.

Hopefully I'll manage another few posts this month. Have a lovely day xx


Annie said...

Hi Caroline. It's true that there is no more important job than being a mum and what a wonderful job you are doing with your special little girl. It is so good to see Ayla growing up and you certainly make sure that her life, how ever long it is, is as full of special events as you can make it. Please give her a big hug from me....and have one for yourself too :-)
Annie x

Ladkyis said...

I remember the blog where you told us the diagnosis and I cried for you. I am not a person who prays so I simply sent you healing thoughts. It is so wonderful to read about Ayla and her refusal to be catalogued.
I think you are marvellous! Your strength when things are hardest and your unbounded love for your daughter are inspirational.
Thank you

Alison said...

How lovely to see you blogging again....I can only imagine how busy your life is with your Ayla..you truly ARE an inspiration! Xx